No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
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