she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Randomize
