do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
Just took my morning after pill in the library
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
Two words: blizzard sex
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Randomize
