this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
well you can't waste a boner
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
Randomize
