I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Randomize
