super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize
