Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
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