guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize