And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
