My brain says no but my pants say off.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
last night I used snow as a chaser
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
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