Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Randomize
