I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
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