your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
Randomize
