He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
Randomize
