Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize
