She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
Just high enough for therapy.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Randomize
