I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
