Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
Randomize
