we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
Randomize
