our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
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