its not stalking. its research.
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Randomize
