Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
it's great music for shaving your balls
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
I think people are normalizing furries
Randomize
