I wanna passion pit in your ass
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize
