how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
