Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
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