everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Help. Why am I so naked?
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
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