McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
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