Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
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