I CAN MOONWALK!
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
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