hell yes lets make some ravioli
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
