My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
Randomize
