I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
everyone is single if you try hard enough
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
