Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize
