I want to make a zoo with you.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
I would fuck him just for his dog
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize