I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Sext me about skeletons
Randomize
