I want to have your abortion
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize