just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Randomize
