imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Randomize
