I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
