Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
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