shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
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