went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Randomize
