Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
I would ride that face into the sunset
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
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