i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
