PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
