Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
