every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
Randomize
