im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize
