Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
This is classic penis vs brain.
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
