hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Randomize
